Cheating spouses are like dogs with their food. The dog doesn’t really need the extra food to survive, but he doesn’t want to let go of it either. The same goes for a cheating spouse.
They already know that they are in a marriage with a good partner where they are probably getting enough love and affection, but they want to have an affair with another person as well. This is because they know that they can cheat even though they shouldn’t! They know infidelity in marriage is wrong but they consciously make a decision to have an affair simply because they can; and that’s what is hurtful. Unfortunately, in these times, it is expected. More than 70% of all marriages in the US break up due to infidelity in marriage. Cheating spouses may then go on to have multiple affairs that don’t really provide the emotional security and affection that is seen in marriage but it still does not matter.
Why is this relevant to me?
If you have been married for more than a year, it’s time for you to consider this article as well. Infidelity in marriage is extremely common after the honeymoon phase of a wedding. Spouses get tired, bored, stressed out with the close proximity of marriage and they tend to take each other for granted. Children put additional pressure on a marriage as both parents now have to buckle down to care for a third person. This may result in a shift of attention to the baby which spouses find difficult to deal with. No matter, what the reason, infidelity in marriage first starts with emotional cheating. A case is question is Brad Pitt who quickly got close to Angelina Jolie during the filming of Mr and Mrs Smith. Although both of them swore up-and-down that they were not having an affair, Brad went on to quickly divorce the then Mr-Pitt Jennifer Anniston to hook up with Angelina. To date, Angelina denies that they had an affair during the filming of the movie. However, the fact is that they did get emotionally close which resulted in an emotional affair; quickly followed up by an explosive physical one.
Watch out for:
We suggest that you love your partner but consider, that they have contemplated an affair. Affairs usually follow a simple pattern. Connecting emotionally and physically with a new person requires time and that means an affair will take time to develop. If you pay close attention to your spouse, you will be able to catch subtle changes in behavior which indicate an affair. We suggest you watch out for these simple warning signs that could be indicating the start of an affair.
1. Your spouse starts to draw away from you. Emotional cheating starts first as your partner starts chatting and confiding with another person. This naturally brings them closer and they have to spend more and more time with each other. This means that your spouse starts to pull away from you. He or she spends more time at work or away from home. They frequently cancel family outings or events with work-related excuses.
2. Your spouse changes his physical appearance suddenly. He or she starts dressing differently or buying expensive clothing, perfumes, make-up, shoes etc which they never wore before. These are classic signs of a cheater as your spouse is primping for their new lover.
3. Your spouse starts getting more critical of your behavior. Unconsciously, your spouse is comparing you with their new lover and he is picking fights with you to justify the affair. By this time, your spouse has already started a physical relationship. The fights and criticism are just a way for them to pin the guilt of the affair on you so that they can continue with the affair.
4. Working out at the gym is another indicator of a cheating spouse. The change of clothes, sweaty workout and showers are an easy way to hide an affair. Smart cheaters also learn to use gym lockers to hide essentials like sexy clothing, condoms and contraceptives for the affair.
What to do if you have found signs of a cheater?
Get proof of the infidelity before confronting them. If they offer work-related excuses, check with his office before confronting him. Visit the gym, check credit card charges, mobile phone bills and even his bank account to ensure that you have the proof. If necessary, snoop on his phone with special software, check his email id and get in touch with a detective. Back up all accusations with proof or your spouse will just refute the charges and turn the situation on you, making you seem like the bad person.
Trust your intuition as its just your subconscious telling you to acknowledge the truth that you already know, so watch out for infidelity in marriage.